But all good things must come to an end. I have had my fun and part of me actually feels ready to start my second year in school. I'm surprisingly excited to start learning. I know this won't last long though. I always go into a semester super enthusiastic and everything but once the mountain of work starts piling up, I'll inevitably find myself curled up on my bathroom floor with the shower running and I'll be crying and basically having an epic meltdown (that has regrettably happened before). And I've heard the worst horror stories about year 2 from my seniors. Apparently you don't get to sleep some nights. I don't know.
I'm excited and nervous and everything but I'm mostly glad to be going back to a scheduled life. Holidays are great but they are also pretty unscheduled. There are days when you just sit in a corner and read and there are days when you are half productive. It's all very messy which I don't always like. I like order. I need to know what's happening in my life.
Since I'm going into a new year of school, I decided that I would do a little mid-year resolution type thing. If you've been reading my blog for a while, you would know that my grandpa died about 6 hours before 2015 began and also that I was in Bali when he passed. It was a very chaotic and scary start to my year and because of that, I didn't welcome the year the way I planned to. I wanted to do proper resolutions and do a 2014 wrap up. But I just couldn't do it and by the time I was ready to, it no longer made sense.
I did a short new year post on Christmas though and I scheduled it to go up on the 1st. I actually almost forgot that I did that with the chaos of the days and I had no way to pull it down because I was in Bali and had no way to get it down. So I let it be. Anyway, in that post, I mentioned that my resolutions were to:
- Say yes more often.
- Be confident. I am not an ugly person and I have no reason to feel that way.
- Don't let anxiety and worry control you.
I think that I have done a pretty good job of keeping to them over the last 4 months. I have said yes to at least 90% of what I've been asked to do. I have started putting in more effort in dressing well and doing my makeup well and I feel beautiful. I really do. I'm still working on the anxiety and fear. In fact I still do get anxiety attacks especially at night and they are horrible but I'm working really hard on walking into situations with a no fear attitude.
So I decided to update my resolutions. School edition. Remember that you never have to wait for a new year or a new month to decide that you can change something about yourself. If you decide today that you don't like something and want to change it, do it right now. Don't feel you need to wait for a particular day to do it. Because then it will never work. Resolutions can be made at any time.
- Don't procrastinate. I will finish as much of my work as I can as soon as possible.
- Don't forget to take time off to relax every now and then
- I will put my all into everything I attempt to do
- I will do more to step out of my comfort zone
So these are my resolution for this new school year. I want to now pose this question to you. Do you have any resolutions? It can even be just one but I would love to hear if you've decided to make any mid-april resolutions. Post them in the comments.
If you are starting school again next week or sometime soon, get excited. It's stressful and scary but it's also exciting because just think of all the amazing things you will learn and experience and do. I wish everyone an amazing school year ahead.